Sunday, April 22, 2012

Tip #7: Insecurity, A Man's (Silent) Burden - Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say

Before I begin my mini-rant, I'd like for you to read this article and try and see how feminism has ruined man's opportunity to  express real insecutrities:

http://shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/15-things-men-really-wish-knew-212600930.html

I have a problem with this article..
I'm reading 'Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say' by Warren Farrell. It's about how men have it as bad as women do, and men have the same problems women do (except for obvious physiological responsibilities).

In fact, men have "second shift" lives too by majority being required do house rapairs,remodeling, lawn work (etc, and without credit !), recieve criticism from their supervisors (and never complain about it), and then come home to a woman who expects him to keep his job at all costs (or she will divorce him, take the kids, and compalain about not enough child support) as she yells at him for not doing any chores.

He feels all the pressures of the world burdened by the silence enforced by "real men don't cry" and "real men look weak if they complain". There's a reason men turn to their tvs, beer, sports, and other men who turn to the same things: because accessing feelings is forbidden by society (women love strong silent men with jobs...not crybabies).

No actual insecurity or tip for open communication was mentioned in this cosmo joke.
Half of the quotes are women confidence boosters, not actual insight into the man's mind.

We women are outspoken about everything, even about how "men can't communicate", but men bear the burder of silence.

Yahoo would do a great service to women by writing a story about the man struggle in life, and not just dating tips for women using men for quotes.

Just a light disclaimer: I am not putting women's accomplishments, "second shifts", or struggles down. What I'm saing is everyone knows about women's struggles, but very few could even begin to explain Man's, because men's coping mechanism are so well disguised, they are labled "lazy" "insensitive" "addiction", or just plain "clueless".

If you are a woman, and find yourself itching to "defend", perhaps explore those feelings. What is so threatening about men being able to express themselves as openly as women do? What is wrong with acknowledging how much men work and suffer for it?

Tip #7: Take a moment and imagine how men feel next time you jump to criticize something about them. The level of empathy women have for eachother should be both an example and opportunity to have empathy for the male-struggle. 

Until next time,

Peace, blessedness, and light.